There is no daily funny today. Sowee.

Zoe’s birthday party is right around the corner and tomorrow I’m throwing her and her cousin Ellis a birthday party to celebrate it together with just the cousins. I’m trying not to be a diy freak this year because I’m tired ALL THE TIME and I have 2 kids to take care of…but sometimes I can’t stop the inner beast. It’s like I’m at war with my normal self and my diy self and my diy self always wins the battle because next thing you know I’m sweating my ass off from running around trying to grab all the supplies I need and end up waiting in line for 20 minutes at Michael’s to get my stuff rung up. I shall post my little diy’s later… Here’s a photo to hold ya over…
 
                      

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Did you see the Princess and the Frog? Do you remember the scene at the party after Tiana finds out that she lost the building for her dream restaurant to a high bidder? Charlotte takes her up to her room and that’s where she gets dressed in the blue dress and then once Charlotte leaves the room she starts to sing “I’m Almost There” but in a more somber note? That’s what Zoe does when she’s sad after she gets in trouble with me. For example, let’s say we got into a fight because I didn’t give her candy. I’m telling her she has to earn it by sleeping in her bed all night and not leaving her room till it’s light out. She doesn’t of course and in the morning she still expects her candy. So we fight about it and I end the argument with a “ZOE IF YOU ASK ME FOR CANDY ONE MORE TIME I SWEAR YOU’RE GOING TO TIME OUT!” She’ll start moping around the room real slowly (Tianaesque-like), and she’ll run her hand over whatever furniture she’ll come upon in this like wistful way and then with tears still in her eyes you can hear her singing to herself in a really sad voice…

Zoe: I’m almost there, almost there… people gonna come here from everywhere… I’m almost *sigh* there.

 OH CUT THE CRAP! I mean come on! SO dramatic. I can already hear some of you Zoe lovers saying to “Just give it to her!” but I’m not rewarding her for not doing anything. Believe it or not I don’t always give in to her. I’m not her father.

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So earlier this week I was talking to my mother on the phone and she told me she wanted to buy Zoe a princess dress for her birthday but she didn’t know which one and asked that I go pick one up and that she’ll pay me back but I told her I don’t have time to go to the mall this week. I’m running all my errunds during my lunch breaks at work. So I told her I’d call the Disney store at the mall by her house. This was my conversation with the woman at the store…

Me: Hi I was wondering if you guys carried the Jasmine costume?
Woman: No I’m sorry. We’re out.
Me: Well, do you have Mulan?
Woman: No I’m sorry. We have Ariel, Aurora, Tiana, Cinderella, oh and we have 2 different kinds for Cinderella, the regular blue and a wedding one, oh and the latest princess one is Rapunzel. Would you like any of those?
Me: Ummmm no thank you.
Woman: Is this for your daughter?
Me: Yeah she’s turning 3 and my mother wanted to buy her a dress so I was just calling ahead for her to find out what you had.
Woman: Well I’m sure she’d love one of these even though we don’t have the Jasmine one currently.
Me: Oh no. I’m sorry. It’s not that. Um we have all of them.
Woman: All of the ones I mentioned?
Me: Yes.
Woman: Even the two Cind…
Me: Yes. Both of them. Hahahahaha.
Woman: Hahahahahaha. Well let’s see, we have Tinkerbell?
Me: That would work! Hahaha

Dude. She’s so spoiled and she don’t even know it. I didn’t even have half the shit she had when I was little. We had garage sale toys for Christmas. I’m talking used people. My sisters will back me up on this. The Cabbage Patch dolls that EVERYONE and their GRANDMOTHERS had when we were little? We had the imitation ones from Korea. You know how we know they weren’t real? Nancy, my youngest sister, her Cabbage Patch had hot pink hair. Hot pink people. There were no adoption certificates and I know the Xavier Roberts signature had to be a fake too. We didn’t care though. Well I’m sure Nancy cared but the rest of us didn’t care. We FINALLY had a toy that everyone else had! I named mine Elizabeth. I gave mine to Zoe.

:: 02.12.11 :: Oliver’s 2nd Birthday
Olly’s so sweet. We love you little boy! I’m so sorry we got there soooo late. We missed the group craft part of it. Kayden was being a punk so I couldn’t take that many photos since he was bjorned to me. They had the party at the Children’s Museum of the Arts. It’s such a cute space. I loved it. I think I loved it more than the kids. The place just wreaked of arts and crafts. I wish I could have seen their supply closet.
 



       

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
So I was washing the dishes when I heard the hubs trying to have a talk with Zoe…

Hubs: Zoe, who do you love more? Mommy or Daddy?
Me: Hahaha why? Why? Why do you torture yourself?
Hubs: (ignoring me) Zoe, who do you love more? Mommy or Daddy?
Zoe: I love mommy more.
Hubs: Why?
Zoe: Because mommy is gentle and ahpah you’re fat and you’re a horrible singer.

I did not teach her this but it is true. The horrible singer part. The fat part…ehhh not so much but he does have a bigger gut than before. He makes fun of mine but hey, I had two kids, what’s your excuse?

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:: 03.05.11 :: Figurines and Zoe’s Room
So when my niece Josie was just a little tot we bought her The Little Mermaid figurine set for her birthday. Now that she’s turning 6 I asked my sister if Zoe could have it. She looked around for the set and mailed what she had with a note. Sebastian and Flounder, we could have had something beautiful. Rest in peace.
                      

Zoe’s MANY other figurines…


Zoe’s Hello Kitty Animal Costumed collection…

       

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
I thought I’d list the pronounciation of some of the words that Zoe says…

Megamind = Mangled Mind
Remote = Merope
Triceratops = tycerachops
Yellow = Lellow
Adult = Dolt
Money = Menu
Imagination = Magerations
Tatoo = Catoo
Section = Shehkshun

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When I took Kayden to church for the first time our friend Irene said “He doesn’t look like a baby. He looks like a little man.” I thought this was funny because I, as his mother, thinks this is ridiculous. He clearly looks like a baby to me. Well a few mondays ago I dropped him off at school and the nursery room teacher who I call hahlmohnee (grandmother) said in Korean…

Hahlmohnee: He looks like he got so big over the weekend! And he doesn’t look like a baby.
Me: What does he look like?
Hahlmohnee: I don’t know but he doesn’t look like a regular baby.
Me: (thinking of Irene) Um, does he look like a little man?
Hahlmohnee: YES! YES! That’s what he looks like!

So a little bit after we brought Kayden home the hubs flat out asked me “Who do you love more?” I blatantly said “Zoe.” He was like “Wow Kayden! Did you hear that? Your mother blah blah blah…” shut it. Zoe’s almost 3. This little girl was my life for the past 3 years. She was my first and my only you know? What we have now we’ve built on with trust, and love, and patience, and some timeouts, and spankings along the way. So naturally of course I’d love her more. I think it’s a little weird when mothers say “I loved my child the second I laid eyes on them.” I’m just thinking “You don’t even know them.” Yeah you carried this baby for a good 9 months but that doesn’t mean you know them. I did not love both of my children right away. I mean I cared for them because it was my maternal instinct to but It wasn’t like love at first sight just because I pushed them out and carried them for 9 months. I mean I thought they were cute because they were babies and all tiny and who doesn’t adore babies? Ya know? I grew to love Zoe just like I’ll grow to love Kayden more and more as time goes on. I don’t feel bad for saying it either. Some people are downright shocked when I say this but I’m being honest. Yes. I’m pretty sure that eventually I won’t be able to say I love one more than the other but that will take time. It’s only been 4 months and I’m still getting to know the little guy. With any relationship you need to get to know each other to truly fall head over heels in love with someone. Do I love Kayden? Yes. I’m starting to fall for the little fatty. We actually have a relationship now. It’s not the “Someone feed me! Someone change me! Someone burp me!” relationship anymore. He recognizes me now. He follows me with his eyes as I walk around the room. If I leave he’ll start to cry. He gets so excited sometimes when we make eye contact and goes into some sort of respiratory frenzy like breathing. Now I make him do peek-a-boo with his hands and he starts to laugh or I’ll make him clap his hands and then tap his cheeks with his hands and he’ll start smiling this contagious grin. Oh I’m falling alright.

 

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Yesterday Zoe went over to play with her cousins. When she got home I told her she had to take a bath and get ready for bed. She said…

Zoe: I wanna take a bath but I don’t want to wash my hair.
Me: Why don’t you want to wash your hair?
Zoe: Because you’re not gentle and you need to be gentle cause I’m just a kid.

 I am too gentle.

My Husband’s Funny:
So after we put the kids to bed C and I were in the kitchen area just tidying up. I was on one side of the kitchen and he was on the other and I was about to reach for a can of Sac Sac and said…

Me: Hun do you want some Sac Sac?
C: For a second I thought you said “Do you want some sex sex.”

 No.

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This is always fun for parents. You take an old photo of your first and do a similar photo with the 2nd.
 

Zoe’s Daily Funny:

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
So sometimes I have the tv on while Zoe eats dinner. I use it as my AK47. “Zoe if you don’t take another bite I swear to God I’m gonna shut it off!” “Zoe! Ok fine pausing till you take a bite!” “Zoe so help me if you don’t eat RIGHT NOW I’m gonna break your Snow White DVD in half!”

So yesterday she was eating dinner and watching Jake and the Neverland Pirates when I was blurting out my threats…

Me: ZOE! You take a bite of your dinner right now! Zoe Olivia! Mommy said RIGHT NOW.
Zoe: (smiling at me while waving her hand in my face) Calm down I’m going to bossy.

Why I oughta…

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So post baby I stopped pumping at around 2 months. Auntie Menstrual returned around 3 months and I just started shedding like a mofo about a week ago. Like, it looks like a little black mouse died by my shower drain each morning.

Anyways, did I mention that C and I hate our kids from the hours of 10pm-6am this week? We’re so tired! I feel like a zombie during the day. I really don’t know how we’re functioning.

For the past 3 days Zoe has been crying when I would drop her off. She wouldn’t cry when we go into the school but right when I leave she clings on and starts to bawl her eyes out and tells me she wants me to stay with her at school and not to go to work. The director thinks it’s because she’s still transitioning from having a little brother. I really don’t think so. I think it’s because her bff Crystal moved up a class as of this week. If you remember, she’s the little girl I wrote about that’s been picking on Zoe. They have such a love hate relationship with each other.

So this morning I’m driving her to school and she says to me…

Zoe: Mommy I’m not gonna cry about you today.
Me: Oh yeah? When? At school?
Zoe: Yeah. I’m not gonna cry about you.
Me: Ok don’t. I don’t want you to cry about me.

So then I thought is it her teacher? Is she not happy with her teacher maybe?

Me: Zoe do you like Mrs Marisol?
Zoe: Yes but I like you better than her..
Me: I know but do you like her?
Zoe: Yes but mommy I like you more better than her.
Me: Ok Zoe I like you too.

Have you guys been following the whole Sheen Mania this week? My husband and I crack up when we see stuff on him. He’s so entertaining. He’s like cartoon for adults. We LOVE him. I just read that it was court ordered that his ex-wife took her 2 year old twins out of the house because she was claiming that they shouldn’t be raised in an environment where Sheen lives with his two “goddess” girlfriends. Girl, I would have pulled them out WAY before this even all broke out in the news. I’m sure all his exes are like “NOW you people understand what we had to deal with.”

“I got magic and I got poetry at my finger tips and this you know, this includes naps.”
“I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available cause if you try it once you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.”

Has anyone seen The Talk? I love Leah Rimini. She cracks me up. Has this show been on a while? Is it good?

I also want to throw in (since I’m just jumping around on topics) that I hate Drake and Kesha. Both their voices annoy me.

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Yesterday the hubs mentioned to Zoe that she had originally wanted a little sister. I don’t even know how it came up.

Me: Zoe, let’s take Kayden back to the hospital and get a little sister instead.
Zoe: No.
Me: Why?
Zoe: I want Kayden.
Me: But don’t you want a little sister?
Zoe: I want a little sister and a little brother.
Me & C: Nope you can only have one.
Me: C’mon. Let’s take Kayden back so you can get a little sister.
Zoe: No.
Me: Why?
Zoe: Because. I love Kayden.

Awww good answer noona.

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Zoe’s birthday is coming up. I can’t believe she’s turning 3! I don’t even think I posted photos YET of her 2^nd birthday. Time seriously just flies when you have kids. Two things on her wish list this year (requested by her majesty personally) is a Tiana princess dress and a guitar. I asked why a guitar and she said “Because Naveen plays a guitar in the Princess and the Frog.” Okaaaaaaaay and that means what? Fine. Whatever. Guitar it is. Because her 2^nd birthday was just a little bit on the chaotic side we decided this year we’d just keep it within the family. So my sister and I decided that we were going to combine Zoe and Ellis’ birthday party so that they can celebrate turning 3 together. This girl has known she was going to turn 3 since October. I went to pick her up at school back in October 2010BK (before Kayden) and her teacher had told me that she invited her to her birthday party. “When is it?” she asked. Uhhhh MARCH hello! She now knows her birth date. I forgot to tell her dad that I had taught her this but she surprised me more when she knew the day it would fall on. “My birthday is March 19^th. It’s a Saturday.” I remember skimming over the calendar saying outloud to myself “Let me see when your birthday is….ok it falls on a Saturday this year.” I didn’t think she was ACTUALLY listening. They’re always listening though. Aren’t they? I have to spell out words to talk to my husband.

C: Babe, where’s the (looking around to see where Zoe’s at) c-h-o-c-o-l-a-t-e.
Me: It’s in the bowl on the shelf right next to her c-a-n-d-y jar.

Me: Today I was talking to Mrs M-a-r-i-s-o-l and Zoe got a time out.
Zoe: Who got a time out?
Me: Nobody. I’m not talking to you. (looking at my husband) N-o-s-e-y!

Mind your own beeswax girl! D-A-M-N-I-T!

So because it’s a boy-girl birthday the theme is Rapunzel & Buzz Lightyear or as Ellis would say “Buzz liker!” Since it’s just family I’m gonna go low-key but yet still make It special for them. What to do, what to do? I won’t be able to do as many diy’s this year though. We shall see how this turns out.

:: 01.31.11 :: Rapunzel

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
She just told me she lives on a Mexican Farm.

I don’t know what to tell ya.

Lately I’ve been really cross with her. I’m sick, my neck went out, I’m tired, and when she doesn’t listen to me I lose it. I think for her she’s just being 2 (almost 3 really). For me I’m just like “WHY IS SHE DISOBEYING ME FOR THE BAJILLIONTH TIME!” I just got off the phone with Nancy this morning and she was telling me how every night she prays to be a better parent (meaning being more patient). I asked for that too, twice this week alone. Last night she was almost off to Lala Land when I turned to her and asked if I was mean to her. With her eyes shut she replied “Only when you’re mad.”  I felt my heart break.

This morning while she was playing I asked her again…

Me: Zoe, Is mommy mean to you?
Zoe: Only when you’re mad.
Me: I’m sorry Zoe. Ok I will be nicer ok?
Zoe: Okay and when I don’t listen you get REALLY mad!
Me: Hahaha ok well you should listen but I’ll be nicer ok? And when I’m being mean you tell me I’m being mean. Okay?
Zoe: Okay

:: 12.11.10 :: Letter to Cousin Josie

Zoe’s Daily Funny: Yesterday Zoe saw an unopened box of sour patch kids on my desk.

Zoe: Can I have that?
Me: What?
Zoe: That (pointing at the box)
Me: No.
Zoe: Why?
Me: Because I say so and that’s for mommy.
Zoe: Mommy can I have some.
Me: No.
Zoe: But I want it.
Me: No.
Zoe: I have to have it.
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA Why do you have to have it?
Zoe: I don’t know.
Me: No.
Zoe: I have to.
Me: No.

Kayden and I are both sick cause of ZOE! You’d think she’d feel bad but she’s like proud. If I start to cough…

Zoe: Oh mommy! Why are you coughing?
Me: Cause you got me sick.
Zoe: Oh….that’s wonderful.

Zoe: Oh my goodness. Why is Kayden coughing mommy?
Me: Cause he has a cold.
Zoe: Why?
Me: Because you got him sick Zoe.
Zoe: Oh great!

Jerk.

:: 12.26.10 :: “Can I hold him?”
                                

:: 12.27.10 :: Pay attention Kayden!