May 14, 2011

  • Angry Birds

    Zoe’s Daily Funny:
    Zoe and her dad just came home from ballet and they were just hanging out while I was cleaning up the downstairs family room. All of a sudden he goes…

    Hubs: Zoe come on let’s go out. I’ll buy you a new toy.
    Zoe: No
    Hubs: Wow. I’m really sad that I have to bribe her to hang out with me.
    Me: Hahaha SO sad.

    She still refused and I told her he’d buy her a new toy. She wanted the Pocahontas and John Smith dolls to add to her collection. I told her he didn’t know what toys these were and if he went by himself he’d probably end up buying her a car toy. So she decided to go so that he didn’t mess up her order.

    As they were leaving I was standing in front of our front door and Zoe turns around and goes…

    Zoe: I’ll miss you. (Hubs in the background goes ”Oh my God!” We igored him.)
    Me: I’ll miss you too. I’m not gonna cry cause I know you’ll be back. (holding back a fake whimper)
    Zoe: Don’t cry. I’ll be back soon. Just sit here on the step and wait for me.
    Me: Um here?
    Zoe: Yes.
    Me: Outside?
    Zoe: Yes. Just wait for me here. On the step. Don’t move.
    Me: Ok, cause I have nothing else to do but to wait for you.
    Zoe: Ok. Don’t cry mama.

    {05.13.11} Siblings & Angry Birds
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May 13, 2011

  • Libraries & Books

    Zoe’s Daily Funny:
    Zoe was playing with her Ariel figurines in our bed one morning this past weekend. Her father comes in and give her a big hug from behind. She tries to push his arms away and with and exasperated sigh she goes…

    Zoe: Apah! You’re making me nuts!

    This morning we were going down the stairs and she was right behind me and said…

    Zoe: When I grow up I wanna be a mommy too! (she was blushing for some reason and she did this embarrassed giggle)
    Me: Oh yeah? That’s great. I bet you’re gonna be a great mom. Are you gonna have babies?
    Zoe: Yeah when I’m big like you.
    Me: Oh yeah how many?
    Zoe: One and Kayden is going to be in my belly too.
    Me: Oh well it doesn’t work like that.
    Zoe: Why?
    Me: Because Kayden is mommy’s baby and when you have a baby it will be a totally different baby in your belly. It will be your own special baby. And you can name him whatever you want. You don’t have to name him Kayden.
    Zoe: I’m gonna name him Xavier.
    Me: Oh really?! I would love that!

    Just in case you don’t know Xavier was the name that I picked for Kayden that Zoe and her father VETOED. I was totally aiming for the end of the alphabet when it came to naming the kids. I would have called him Professor for short. It’s sweet that she remembered the name.

     
    Zoe got her first library card! I’m so excited, way more than she is. The last time I felt like this was when we went to the Yo Gabba Gabba Live show. Once again, WAY more excited than she was. Anyways back to the library card! I miss going to the library. In elementary school I loved going to the library. I even remember my first school, Hancock Elementary (which is no longer there by the way) and I remember we made butter out of cream that was inside a jar and I remember we all took turns shaking the jar. And I remember some teacher brought in her pet boa constrictor and we all took turns petting it. *sigh* And I remember after they shut down that school I started going to Gwyn-Nor Elementary and I remember the librarian’s name, Mrs Atwood and how she had a crush on Tom Selleck. I remember her being really pretty with lots of freckles. I used to just stare at all her freckles. How I remember this I really don’t know. Then the new librarian came along and I think her name was Mrs Gauche. But she was short, chubby with big ajoomah boobies, and she had 2 pet ferrets which was ironic because ferrets love to chew on books apparently (this is what she told us).  Not only that but every summer there was a program that they’d do in our school district to promote reading and you get this library card and can use it at ANY of the elementary schools in our district so we’d go to ALL of them EVERY week. My dad was all about us reading. So we’d have piles of library books at home each week and there were 4 of us in elementary school at one time so that’s a whole lotta borrowed books! AND THEN my dad also signed us up at our local Public library and we’d go to that as well.  *sigh* Ah the memories… and I’m so fond of all of them. I really am. Libraries remind me of my father and just how he really wanted us to love reading. The endless rows of books, the crinkling sound of the clear book jackets, the mossy smell of old pages, the card catalog system (although I heard a lot of places are getting rid of these?), Caldecott Medal stamped books (love), the Dewey Decimal system (is that even still around?)… So nostalgic! Don’t you love that feeling that you get when you reminisce? It’s a shame though. I haven’t read a book in so long unless you count all the books Zoe makes me read her. But I mean an adult book, like Harry Potter (hahaha it is too adult!). I have had the last book since I was pregnant with Zoe and I still have yet to read it!

    Anyways I think Zoe will really enjoy it. I’ve been working on expanding her collection of books. It’s an ongoing process. The hubs and I made this new rule which is NO MORE PRINCESS BOOKS. She goes a little psycho overboard any time she sees any of the Disney Princesses on a cover of a book. Now we have to buy unisex books so that Kayden can like them too. Haha… Seriously enough. Do you know how many books she has based on the movie Tangled? She’s got like 5. Don’t look at me ok? People bought them for her. I bought her ONE and that’s because I didn’t even go to the theater to see it with her so I figure I’d buy her a book and then that way I would get to know the story too as I read it to her. But going back to the princess thing… she’s got the books, the dresses, the dolls… You’ve got your looks! You’re pretty face. And don’t underestimate the importance of body language! HA! Sorry, I went into mermaid mode. Do you do that too? Go into a conversation and then end up singing a song from The Little Mermaid? You’re weird if you don’t. I know you do it Jeenie! Which reminds me, I was having a Peter Pan moment this week where I flashbacked to when I was like 7 and my sisters and I used to LOVE sliding down the stairs on cardboard boxes. I swear I think I’ll be  like forever 7. Which also reminds of this one time at band camp… Actually this one time Zoe was sitting on her bedroom floor and I told her to put on her pants. I look over at her and she put both of her legs in one pant leg and said excitedly “Look at me mama! I’m a mermaid!” Omigod. I almost teared. I USED TO DO THAT TOO! My little protégé. I SHO PROUD (singing in my opera voice)! I swear when I look at Zoe it’s like looking at me. She reminds me so much of myself. Down to the things she hates to eat to the way she talks, her sassiness, the things she does. My mom says she’s “just like you when you were little”. She thinks it’s uncanny and I really see it. Like if I tell her to do something and she holds up her hand in a “talk to the palm” type of manner and says “OKAY BOSSY OKAY CALM DOWN!” I like roll my eyes but I deep down I’m thinking “HOLY SMOKES BATMAN! THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WOULD SAY! TO THE BATCAVE!” Hahaha…. And every now and then I hear her talking to her friends saying “Um excuse me! Excuse me hello?” Hahaha cracks me up. Hello? Totally ME. I’m really enjoying her now because if she is like me then I know I will hate her later so I must take it all in now before she turns into the “rebellious me”.

    So onto my 2 recent book finds…

    :: The Magic Stone ::
    I remember from a few of my previous posts that every time I’d write about Zoe’s books or post photos of her growing collection of books at least one person would write to get her Stone Soup. And I’d think, “that sounds so familiar.” However whenever I would Google the book (there are a few different versions out there now) NONE of them looked familiar to me. So then I bought her the     Marcia Brown version thinking maybe this was it. But the whole time I’m looking at the illustrations I knew it wasn’t. The version I remember started off with a vagabond and he comes upon an old lady and asks her for a place to stay and when he asks her for something to eat she told him she had nothing to eat and so the story of stone soup begins. And then one day I FOUND IT! I saw the illustrations and got excited! The version I read was called The Magic Stone. The author is Fran Hunia and the illustrator is Martin Aitchison. His illustrations are beautiful! Which also brings me to the next book I found after MUCH research.

    ::     The Magic Paintbrush     ::
    I have been looking for this stupid book foh-eh-vuh, foh-eh-vuh, foh-eh-vuh! Did anyone see The Sandlot?
    Anyways I can’t remember if I read this book or if I saw it on Reading Rainbow but I loved this story! I read the version by Demi but I just remember the illustrations being more elaborate? I was searching for a while and then gave up. I saw the     Demi version at Zoe’s school on the couch in the lobby when I dropped her off one morning last week and asked the Grandmother in the nursery room if I could take it and bring it back at the end of the day. She looked at me funny and said “For Zoe?” I said “No. For me.” And then she started to laugh at me like what kind of a grown ass woman reads children books without her children kind of laugh. Sticks and stones halmohni. Sticks and stones. Anyways a few of the pages were ripped out (damnit kids!). And so began my search ONCE AGAIN for the book that is The Magic Paintbrush which when I find it will have illustrations where I will say “I PINDING! I ROOKING POR YOU RONG TIME! SHUCKSHESS ISH MINE!” And then 2 weeks ago I PINDING! I ROOKING POR YOU RONG TIME! SHUCKSHESS ISH MINE!” I saw the illustrations online and was like SHIVER ME TIMBERS! This is it! (You know shiver me timbers in French is diable m’emporte? Just in case you didn’t know. I Googled it). It’s been in front of my face this whole time whenever I would do a google search but I never bothered clicking on the image. Like duh. Coulda saved me a lot of time. Now I know and knowing is half the battle. *fist in the air stance* G. I. Joe! I actually found this book FIRST which led me to further probe into the illustrator which is how I found The Magic Stone! You see? Same illustrator. The stars were aligned in my universe that day and the book gods were smiling down at me!  Yahoo! Anyways these books are hard to find because they were published by a London based Publishing company. I found them used online in the states each for under 10 bucks.  I’ve read the Magic Paintbrush to Zoe 6x already. I don’t know if you guys have ever experienced this but my mommy mission was to find this book, which I did, I read it to her, and when I got to the end of the book I was thinking “Wow I don’t remember this but the ending kinda sucks!” Hahaha I hyped it up so much in my mind.  Man. I hate when that happens.

    I am on a hunt for another story though. Apparently it’s about a Chinese Cinderella. I saw this when I was little on CBS Storybreak one Saturday morning. Do you remember that show?!! I loved it! I also loved watching the Menudos but we’ll save that for a rainy day. So basically it’s pretty much the same theme only it’s based in China and the fairy Godmother is really a goldfish who actually gets killed and eaten by the stepmother. I know. Morbid. You know the Chinese. They’re not about candy coatin’ it. They just tell it like it is. Hahaha Hardcore yo. Anyhoots I found a book that I’m thinking of buying. Does anyone else know this story?

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May 10, 2011

  • NY Times Article: FDA Panel to Consider Warnings for Artificial Food Colorings

    { by Gardiner Harris } Direct link here.

    WASHINGTON — After staunchly defending the safety of artificial food colorings, the federal government is for the first time publicly reassessing whether foods like Jell-O, Lucky Charms cereal and Minute Maid Lemonade should carry warnings that the bright artificial colorings in them worsen behavior problems like hyperactivity in some children.

    The Food and Drug Administration concluded long ago that there was no definitive link between the colorings and behavior or health problems, and the agency is unlikely to change its mind any time soon. But on Wednesday and Thursday, the F.D.A. will ask a panel of experts to review the evidence and advise on possible policy changes, which could include warning labels on food.

    The hearings signal that the growing list of studies suggesting a link between artificial colorings and behavioral changes in children has at least gotten regulators’ attention — and, for consumer advocates, that in itself is a victory.

    In a concluding report, staff scientists from the F.D.A. wrote that while typical children might be unaffected by the dyes, those with behavioral disorders might have their conditions “exacerbated by exposure to a number of substances in food, including, but not limited to, synthetic color additives.”

    Renee Shutters, a mother of two from Jamestown, N.Y., said in a telephone interview on Tuesday that two years ago, her son Trenton, then 5, was having serious behavioral problems at school until she eliminated artificial food colorings from his diet. “I know for sure I found the root cause of this one because you can turn it on and off like a switch,” Ms. Shutters said.

    But Dr. Lawrence Diller, a behavioral pediatrician in Walnut Creek, Calif., said evidence that diet plays a significant role in most childhood behavioral disorders was minimal to nonexistent. “These are urban legends that won’t die,” Dr. Diller said.

    There is no debate about the safety of natural food colorings, and manufacturers have long defended the safety of artificial ones as well. In a statement, the Grocery Manufacturers Association said, “All of the major safety bodies globally have reviewed the available science and have determined that there is no demonstrable link between artificial food colors and hyperactivity among children.”

    In a 2008 petition filed with federal food regulators, the Center for Science in the Public Interest, a consumer advocacy group, argued that some parents of susceptible children do not know that their children are at risk and so “the appropriate public health approach is to remove those dangerous and unnecessary substances from the food supply.”

    The federal government has been cracking down on artificial food dyes for more than a century in part because some early ones were not only toxic but were also sometimes used to mask filth or rot. In 1950, many children became ill after eating Halloween candy containing Orange No. 1 dye, and the F.D.A. banned it after more rigorous testing suggested that it was toxic. In 1976, the agency banned Red No. 2 because it was suspected to be carcinogenic. It was then replaced by Red No. 40.

    Many of the artificial colorings used today were approved by the F.D.A. in 1931, including Blue No. 1, Yellow No. 5 and Red No. 3. Artificial dyes were developed — just as aspirin was — from coal tar, but are now made from petroleum products.

    In the 1970s, Dr. Benjamin Feingold, a pediatric allergist from California, had success treating the symptoms of hyperactivity in some children by prescribing a diet that, among other things, eliminated artificial colorings. And some studies, including one published in The Lancet medical journal in 2007, have found that artificial colorings might lead to behavioral changes even in typical children.

    The consumer science group asked the government to ban the dyes, or at least require manufacturers to include prominent warnings that “artificial colorings in this food cause hyperactivity and behavioral problems in some children.”

    Citizen petitions are routinely dismissed by the F.D.A. without much comment. Not this time. Still, the agency is not asking the experts to consider a ban during their two-day meeting, and agency scientists in lengthy analyses expressed skepticism about the scientific merits of the Lancet study and others suggesting any definitive link between dyes and behavioral issues. Importantly, the research offers almost no clue about the relative risks of individual dyes, making specific regulatory actions against, say, Green No. 3 or Yellow No. 6 almost impossible.

    The F.D.A. scientists suggested that problems associated with artificial coloring might be akin to a peanut allergy, or “a unique intolerance to these substances and not to any inherent neurotoxic properties” of the dyes themselves. As it does for peanuts and other foods that can cause reactions, the F.D.A. already requires manufacturers to disclose on food labels the presence of artificial colorings.

    A spokeswoman for General Mills refused to comment. Valerie Moens, a spokeswoman for Kraft Foods Inc., wrote in an e-mail that all of the food colors the company used were approved and clearly labeled, but that the company was expanding its “portfolio to include products without added colors,” like Kool-Aid Invisible, Capri Sun juices and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese Organic White Cheddar.

    The panel will almost certainly ask that more research on the subject be conducted, but such calls are routinely ignored. Research on pediatric behaviors can be difficult and expensive to conduct since it often involves regular and subjective assessments of children by parents and teachers who should be kept in the dark about the specifics of the test. And since the patents on the dyes expired long ago, manufacturers have little incentive to finance such research themselves.

    Popular foods that have artificial dyes include Cheetos snacks, Froot Loops cereal, Pop-Tarts and Hostess Twinkies, according to an extensive listing in the consumer advocacy group’s petition. Some grocery chains, including Whole Foods Market and Trader Joe’s, refuse to sell foods with artificial coloring.

May 6, 2011

  • Friday Funny: Why I Am Now Divorced

    Last week was my birthday and I didn’t feel very well waking up on that morning.

    I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my husband would be pleasant and say,
    ‘Happy Birthday!’, and possibly have a small present for me.

    As it turned out, he barely said good morning, let alone ‘ Happy Birthday.’

    I thought…. Well, that’s marriage for you, but the kids…. they will remember.

    My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn’t say a word..

    So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

    As I walked into my office, my handsome Boss Steve, said,
    ‘Good Morning, lady, and by the way Happy Birthday! ‘

    It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

    I worked until one o’clock, when Steve knocked on my door and said,
    ‘You know, It’s such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday,
    what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me..’

    I said, ‘Thanks, Steve, that’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!’

    We went to lunch.
    But we didn’t go where we normally would go.
    He chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table.
    We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

    On the way back to the office, Steve said,
    ‘You know, It’s such a beautiful day… We don’t need to go straight back to the office, do We?’

    I responded, ‘I guess not. What do you have in mind?’
    He said, ‘Let’s drop by my place, it’s just around the corner.’

    After arriving at his house, Steve turned to me and said,
    ‘If you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I’ll be right back.’
    ‘Ok.’ I nervously replied.

    He went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes,
    he came out carrying a huge birthday cake …
    Followed by my husband, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers,
    all singing ‘Happy Birthday‘.

    And I just sat there….

    On the couch…. Naked.

April 29, 2011

  • Video: That Was A Good Song.

    Zoe’s Daily Funny:
    Last week our friend Hans came over for lunch. Zoe was eating across from him at the dining room table and she goes…

    Zoe: Do you have kids?
    Hans: No.
    Zoe: Oh. Why?
    Me: Zoe, Hans samchun needs a wife first if he’s gonna have kids.
    Zoe: Do you have a wife?
    Hans: No.

    Zoe thinks about this for a second and says…
    Zoe: Is it because no one understands you?

  • Video: Kid at The Apple Store

    TGIF!
    (sent from my sister)

April 28, 2011

  • Tree House Envy

    Any time I see a movie with a tree house I get jealous. The Sandlot, Jack, Orphan, Nim’s Island, Swiss Family Robinson. I even got jealous of the tree house in Tarzan. That’s right, the Disney cartoon version. My tree house envy is bad people. You have no idea. I just don’t talk about it but it’s always there. I’ll just stand there and think of something like “man, when was the last time I changed Kayden’s diaper? I wonder if I planted a tree in the backyard now how long it would take to be fully grown for my tree house? Probably after I die? God! What is that funky smell? Kayden pooped! I’ve been waiting for that all day. If I used baby feces as fertilizer I wonder how much quicker the tree would grow. I wonder if it’s more of a miracle than Miracle Grow.” I think I’m toning it down a lot but if you guys only knew the amount of research I did while ignoring my children and squandering over the internet you would think I was psychotic. Zoe could’ve been like “mommy I’m playing with matches and I just lit the drapes on fire.” “I wouldn’ve been like “that’s nice honey. Don’t forget the blinds too.” I’m just documenting this now so that you don’t keep reading my page and two years down the line while reading one of my posts you’ll think “I think this woman is crazy”. Um hello? It’s been documented that I was on April , 2011 at approximately ! Stupid. If I actually wrote down all the research I did I think it would have to take about 3-4 entries

    If you know me you will know that I am obsessed with playhouses and treehouses and anything that ends with “houses”…. not including outhouses. My husband knows this too. I was all about “If we buy a house it has to have a backyard so I can make a tree house.” After we bought our house with the treeless yard it was “after we move out of this house and into a new house with a tree in the backyard 10 years later I’m going to make a tree house.” This is on my life list of Things I Want To Do Before I Die. Anytime I see a movie with a treehouse

    So anyways, back to treehouses and playhouse. I know I     wrote a post before on a few playhouses that I thought were really cute (which is really a back up to my tree house plan).

    Ohdeedoh had     this posted not too long ago. A treehouse bed. Hello?! LOVE! It just made me think of my tree house dream. Kayden and Zoe, I solemnly swear that I will make you a tree house/play house before you’re too big to play in it.

    I would paint this yellow or green. Maybe even light blue.
    treehouse bed

April 26, 2011

  • Update

    Zoe’s Daily Funnies (2 today):
    I know I posted before on how she wanted to trade Kayden for Keira (only because she still wants a little sister) and her father kept rubbing her disloyalty in her face. This week out of the blue I said to Kayden “Kayden did you know that noona wanted to TRADE YOU for another baby!?

    Zoe starts running over to us and starts going “SHHHHHHHHHHH SHHHHHHHHHH SHHHHHHHHHHH Mommy! Mommy! Don’t tell Kayden!SHHHHH! Don’t tell Kayden!!!”

    Girl knows she betrayed her little brother and is just a wee bit ashamed. Just a wee bit.


    One day last week I just brought the kids back home from school and I was taking off my shoes and jacket when I saw Zoe crouch over Kayden in his car seat and I heard her say…

    Zoe: Aww Kayden. You’re sooooo cute. Why are you cute? Huh?
    Me: Zoe you’re his big sister right?
    Zoe: Yeah I’m his noona.
    Me: That’s right and you love your little brother right?
    Zoe: Yeah!
    Me: So if anyone ever bothers Kayden or hits him you beat them up.
    Zoe: (telling Kayden) If anyone hits you I’m gonna SLAP THEM ACROSS THE FACE LIKE THIS! (proceeds to do invisible slaps in the air) and then I’m gonna TELL THE POLICE and they’re gonna PUT THEM IN JAIL and GIVE THEM A BIG TIME OUT and then I’m gonna go there and SLAP THEM ACROSS THE FACE AGAIN LIKE THIS (another invisible slap demonstration)!

    How she got so violent I don’t know. Ok for the record her invisible slaps were really whimpy. However I do fear for the first kid that lays their hands on Kayden. 

    So I haven’t been blogging lately. My mother in law is in Korea and we just moved Zoe over to her new room. I only have the weekends to paint so we started painting 2 Sundays ago and I just did the 2nd coat of paint this past Saturday and just finished up on the 2nd coat of paint for her closet this past Sunday and moved everything in except her bed. I just want to air it out a bit before moving her in there to sleep. It’s pinkalicious. On Sunday she was hanging out in the living room in her Cinderella dress and I said to her (after I just got done painting her closet) “Zoe, do you want to go see your room? She excitedly said “YES!” So we go up and she runs into the room, does a few twirls, clasps her hands together and exclaimed “It’s all that I’ve ever dreamed!”  Ok. I think we need to cut back on watching Disney princess movies.

    So Kayden has been sick for like 3 weeks. He had a cold, got over the cold, and then like 2 days laterhe got something else. He kept coughing this wheezy sounding cough, and had a runnyn nose, and diahrhea. I took him to the dr’s last Monday and he said Kayden had     bronchiolitis. The doctor says that we just have to wait it out and that it could last a couple of weeks. Oy vey.He’s still coughing. Last night he coughed so much that he threw up all over our bedroom floor. I was trying to put Zoe down and we were reading Monster’s Inc when I heard “HUN!!!!” coming from my bedroom. I run in and I see the hubs holding out his arms holding Kayden and I see the aftermath of a milk vomit explosion. Kayden had it all over his clothes, there was white streams coming out of his nose and white dribble all over his chin, it was all over his clothes, all over the hubs arm and shirt, all over our floor. *sigh*     It’s always something with these kids, ya know? This is his 2nd time throwing up since he was diagnosed with bronchiolitis. Sometimes he’ll be sleeping soundly and he’ll start coughing and wake up. I don’t think he’s been sleeping well. Plus on top of that, throw in his teething issues and he just a hot chubby mess.

    {04.10.11} New Mulan Costume
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    {04.12.11} Skype Date w/ Lila

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    {04.17.11} Helping Mommy paint the new room. (she actually started to form a blister on each hand)
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April 25, 2011

  • Happy 5 Years Babe!

    Zoe’s Daily Funny:
    This past saturday Zoe and I went to Home Depot in the am to pick up paint for her closet. After we paid for our items we had to get our receipt checked by this tall, old guy by the exit door. He saw us coming and automatically reached into his Home Depot apron and took out a piece of receipt paper that already had a happy face drawn on it. As he gave it to Zoe he said “A happy face for a happy face” and he smiled down at her. She examined her happy face and said “Oooh a happy face!” Then she looked up at this tall man, smiled up at him, and said “MY MOMMY SAID THAT WHEN YOU POOPY IN THE POTTY YOU HAVE TO WIPE YOUR BUTT!” He goes “Ohhhh! I did not know that! I have to start doing that!”

    Hahahaha….

    { 04.15.11 }
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    The hubs and I dropped the kids off 2 fridays ago and took a day off from work to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. For this special day the hubs booked lunch at Momofuku Ko. Never heard of it but ok. He kept saying before hand how it was probably going to be hard to book lunch there. I’m thinking “It’s JUST lunch! What’s the big deal?” A few days pass and he sends me an email and he’s like “you know lunch is like 17 courses.” What? Ok fine. I can eat 17 just as long as there’s a bathroom nearby. Then he drops the motherload a few days later via email, “By the way, you’re not allowed to take pictures in the restaurant. Photography’s banned.” WTF KIND OF A RESTAURANT DOES THIS TO A HUMAN BEING! WHERE THE HELL IS MY HUSBAND TAKING ME TO EAT!!!??? So began my endless research on this Kim Jong-Ilish owned restaurant…

    There’s been a lot of hype around this restaurant and David Chang, the chef himself. First of all you know it’s good cause it’s got 2 Michelin stars to back it up. And our 17 course lunch was memorable even though some dishes were forgettable. I just think the restaurant itself, or maybe perhaps even the chef, comes off a bit cocky. First, you can ONLY book online. Second, there’s ONLY 12 seats so you bet your bottom dollar that if you want reservations there your ass better be glued to your computer till you get your foodie lovin reservation. Third, if you have a party of 3 you can forget about it. They only take even # reservations. Fourth, you CANNOT take photos there. Cameras are banned and if you are caught taking photos with your phone they will most likely hold on to your shit till you leave the restaurant or they may even kick you out. Like I’m just thinking (and pardon my French ahead of time) “Who the fuck are you?” Like seriously. David Chang was asked about the photo ban and he was quoted saying “It’s just food. Just eat it.” Um well hello? If it’s just food why go all out for the pretty presentation? HUH? HUH? HUH?!!!! If it’s just food why is your staff so meticulously slicing the spring chicken (which was effin good btw) as if they were performing a circumcision on a newborn baby? I mean I brought my camera. I was too scared to use it. I even had my phone out just to take notes but I could feel the eyes of the staff peering down on me to try and see if I would dare take an “illegal” photo. HA HA You ASSHOLES! I was just writing down my notes on what I ate you fools! So in yo face! I mean if you’re gonna dish out $175 on prix fixed meal for a 3 hour meal extravaganza don’t you think you should have that right to take photos (minus the flash of course)? I am by no means a foodie. I just like what tastes good but the food here was definitely an experience. I present to you my notes:

    1} oyster shot (only ONE people)
    2} some beet dish (that’s as in ONE beet slice)
    3} cucumber salad
    4} potato soufflé
    5} 5pc sashimi dish
    6} mushroom soup w/ a side dish of a variety of mushrooms and candied cashews
    7} puffed egg
    8} bento box w/ duck meatballs
    9} ricotta dumpling soup
    10} grilled trout on potato salad
    11} charcuterie dish ( I remember hearing the word lamb lard and duck pate)
    12} spring chicken
    13} gelee w/ goat cheese & marscapone
    14} shaved frois grois with lychee, riesling gelee and peanut brittle
    15} english pea ice cream
    16} white miso ice cream in a cone
    17} kimchi onigiri (to go)

    As you can see New York Magazine would not be contacting me to write up a restaurant review for their next issue. I thought everything was good except for the puffed egg dish. I loved the chicken, the trout, and the mushroom dish (exactly in that order). The English pea ice cream was definitely interesting. I didn’t love it but I couldn’t stop eating it and I will definitely not forget it. I’m such a sad photo-taking-whore of a person. I found this guy on Yelp who SECRETLY took photos when he went to his dining experience back in February and I emailed him and basically asked “What was your strategy?”He was one of the lucky ones that got away scott-free. LUCKY BASTARD! If only Kayden didn’t take my ballzinis. I think around the 5th course I asked our nice, goatee-faced chef from Atlanta that was tattooed up for shizzle, “How strict are you guys on the whole photo ban policy?” He shot back “Real strict. We’ll confiscate your camera and break it. Remember we’re bigger than him (pointing at my husband).” LISTEN BUDDY! I DON’T HANDLE THREATS LIGHLTY!!! I gave him a meek “Ok.” Almost mouse-like I’d say. A cowering mouse really. At around the 13th course which was like 2 hours later I asked…

    “You can’t even take a photo on your way out?
    “Nope.
    “What about in the bathroom?
    “Nope.
    “But how would you know if I DID take a photo in the bathroom!?” (I was smiling at him like HA-HA I FOUND A LOOPHOLE YOU BIG HAIRY APE! But now when I think about it, it’s JUST a bathroom)
    “We would hope that you wouldn’t.”

    He was so nice that I couldn’t bring myself to take a photo in the bathroom behind his back. It’s just dishonest. So after mumbling my broken Korean, that only my mother and my husband can decipher, I sent the hubs.

    TAKE THAT MOMOFUKU BASTARDS! We got a photo of your bathroom bookshelf!
    I shoooo shad.
    IMG_20110415_151239

April 22, 2011

  • The Sweetness of Zoe

    I know I haven’t posted in over a week but I wanted to post this one sweet Zoe’s Daily Funny before I forgot…

    Zoe’s Daily Funny:
    Yesterday I went to pick up Zoe and Kayden at their school. Zoe and I were at one of the tables in the main area and we were getting her bag and jacket together. Nearby her friend Crystal was playing with this little toy car (It’s a little bit smaller than a hotrod). So she throws it and it lands on the table in front of us. I said “Crystal you have to be careful. You could hit someone.” She chose to ignore me and she threw it again and it hit me on my sunglasses which was propped on my head. “CRYSTAL!” So the Director of the school saw this happen and she comes over and kneels down and told Crystal to apologize and she wouldn’t and you could tell she was also getting embarrassed. So she called over her mother (who is also Zoe’s teacher) and told her what happened and even she told Crystal to apologize to me. At this point I’m kneeling down and Zoe’s like patting my face and she turns around and goes “Crystal! Say sorry to my mommy! You hit her and that’s not nice!” Crystal still refused. So Zoe turns to me while twirling my hair in her hand and goes…

    “Mommy I’ll say sorry to you since Crystal isn’t saying sorry.”

    And then she hugged me.