Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Zoe came down with her dad this morning while I was already in the kitchen packing her food for school. He comes up to me while Zoe runs off and goes “Do you know what this one said to me?”

Zoe: Ahpah pick me up! Pick me up!
C: Why should I pick you up?
Zoe: Cause you’re a boy.

I can already hear the future conversations with her potential boyfriends: ”Open the door for me.” “Pull my seat out for me.” “Do it. Cause you’re a boy.”

:: 06.27.10 ::


:: 06.28.10 ::


:: 06.29.10 ::

I’ll post and update soon. Just so much to write and edit.

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
While we were in Mexico I remember I was just trying to organize our stuff in the hotel room before we headed out to the pool while C was keep Zoe entertained. I wasn’t really paying attention to their conversation till I heard her say…

Zoe: Daddy you’re Prince Eric. I’m Ariel.
C: Who’s mommy?
Zoe: Mommy’s Flounder.

Um HELLO YOBOSEYOH!? What da eff? Why am I the fish? You’re Flounder you little punk. Steal mah man!

Guess who’s back from Meh-Hee-Ko!? I’ll post an update soon.

In the meantime, my friend sent me this me this and wrote “I thought of you guys when I saw this.”
I have to say it’s pretty funny.

On tuesday night the hubs went out in the evening to run a few errunds. He went to Target to look at the large storage containers because I told him I needed a large one to store all my blankets. He was trying to pry apart two that were stuck together. Due to his impatient, neanderthal, mentallity he got frustrated and tried to literally punch it to get it apart and ended up getting a 5inch gash on his arm. He came home a wounded soldier with blood dripping down his arm. I bandaged up my caveman after giving him a lecture and then we went to sleep.

Wednesday, the next morning he took it off to take a shower and by the time he got out Zoe was up. I told Zoe that Daddy got an ouchie. He showed her, she gasped, and then asked in a concerned voice “what happened?” I didn’t want to tell her it’s cause her father’s an impatient fool so I told her to ask him. He told her it was cause he was running and fell down and that’s why she shouldn’t run too because then she’ll get a big ouchie like daddy (I actually mother approved stamped this lie because she always runs and falls down). Good lie babe!

Yesterday morning he got out of the shower again and then Zoe and I waited for him on the bed to play nurse. I applied some neosporin on his arm and she had a big bandaid ready for him, already peeled, that we had bought for him after school the day before. After she applied the bandaid she gave it her magical healing power kiss and said “it’s all better.” Then she proceeded to lecture him as he sat there naked in his boxers…

Zoe: What happened?
Daddy: I was running and then I fell down. That’s why you don’t run or you’ll get hurt like daddy.
Zoe: Ohhhhh. Is it ouchie?
Daddy: Yes. It’s ouchie.
Me: Daddy fell down and he cried like a little girl. He cried for his mommy. (the husband giving me a dirty look)
Me: Daddy’s sucha  crybaby.
Zoe: A crybaby?
Me: Yeah.
Zoe: (wagging her index finger at her father) Don’t run. Okay?! You don’t listen?! Don’t run! Listen to me! Or you fall down.
Daddy: Okay, okay! Sorry. I listen.
Zoe: Listen to me ok!?
Daddy: Okay bossy.

The hubs and I started laughing. Who does this lil half pint think she is? Haha it was cute though.

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
So in the mornings when I go downstairs to pack up Zoe’s lunch I leave her upstairs with her dad so he can brush her teeth. I can then hear her running in the hall to the top of the stairs by the gate and she always yells down “Mommy come and get me!” Yesterday was the same routine only…

Zoe: Mommy come and get me! (but she said with like despair in her voice)
Me: (From the bottom of the stairs looking up at her) If you want me to come and get you then smile.
Zoe: (Smiling)
Me: Hahaha ok that’s better
As I got to the top of the stairs I said…
Me: If you want me to open the gate you have to give me a kiss.
So she stood on her tippy toes and kissed me from the other side of the gate. But then she cupped my face in both her hands and said in a sad voice…
Zoe: Mommy I never see you anymore.
Me: WHAT?! WHAT are you TALKING about?!
Zoe: I never see you anymore mommy.
Then her dad yells from the bedroom…
C: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! You’re like mommy’s stalker you stalker!
She just totally ignores us and is still holding onto my face and says…
Zoe: I never see you anymore mommy.

I started laughing. What da hell?! She ALWAYS sees me. Such an actress. Dude she is there when I’m peeing or even when I need a private moment to take care of my rectum situation this week she is THERE. Like HELLO YOBOSEHYO!? What is she talking about? I wonder where she learned that from… She’s so funny I swear.

So yesterday I got Tucks like some of you recommended for my butt problem. It actually helped relieve the pain a lot so thank you and it did shrink since the day before. Yay! I also got an offer from Zoe to kiss my ouchie but I turned her down and told her she didn’t want to go there. And it’s so appropriate but this song I feel is dedicated to me this week. If you’re a Tosh.0 fan you probably already saw it. What what in da butt? A hemorrhoid that’s what what in my butt!
Oh I also forgot to mention we are off this Sunday to our Jung Family Vacation 2010 Extravaganza! Meh-hee-co here we come! I’ve been prepping Zoe. So all week it’s been “I wanna go to Zoe’s ocean” or “I swim in the water with mommy and daddy together?” or “I swim in the water like Ariel and Flounder?” or “Can I splash the water in the ocean?” She’s excited. I’m excited. We is all excited to go to Zoe’s ocean!

:: 05.10.10 :: More Potty Training Pics
       

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
On sunday I a had a HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE headache. So I was lying on the couch and Zoe came running towards me and started to throw all the pillows on the floor and said…

Zoe: Mommy let’s play boat.
Me: Zoe I have a ouchie inside my head.
Zoe: Oh. You have a ouchie in your head?
Me: Yeah.
Zoe: Play boat with me mommy.
Me: Zoe my head hurts.

She then climbs on the couch crouches next to my face touches my forehead and said…
Zoe: Here?
Me: Yeah.
Zoe: I give you a bandaid.

She then whips out a magical invisible bandaid and puts it on my head…

Zoe: Let’s play boat mommy.
Me: Zoe I can’t. I’m hurting.

She then kisses me on top of my invisible bandaid and cocks her head so it’s in my face and says…

Zoe: I kiss it. It’s all better now?
Me: Hahhaha yes.
Zoe: Let’s play boat!
Me: Hahaha okay….

How can I not play with her after that? She thinks her kisses have healing powers. Like you can break your leg and she thinks she can just come over and kiss it and you can go back to pushing her on the swing or something.

So this pregnancy is like soooo annoying. *sigh* It’s like last week I had herpes and this week I have a hemroid. Like as in the kind where I think I need a doughnut to sit on. Haha…. Yesterday morning I laughed at something my husband said as we were about to head out the door and then I told him I had to change because I peed a little in my lederhosen. OH COME ON! GOD! GIVE ME A BREAK PLEASE! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU! Pregnant women, practice your kegels!!!! It’s no joke! I trickle when I laugh, or gag, or sneeze. SOOOO ANNOYING!

My husband thinks I’m a hot mess. I sadly agree.

:: 06.10.10 :: Coloring w/ New Jellies While Waiting For The Mail
If she wears these for a long time they actually cut her around her achilles so she now has to wear them with socks. I told her it wasn’t cool to wear socks with sandals but I think she can get away with it.






She insisted that she wear this when we went to pick up her dad at the bus stop.


:: 06.12.10 :: Princess Breakfast @ Paramus Children’s Museum
First time I went to this museum. I thought it was a little ghetto. I don’t know. The girls had fun though so that’s the important thing. I have never been to Disney Land/World but I’m sure the princesses there are WAY better. This will have to do for now till we take her. We went with my friend Theresa and her daughter Chloe who’s a year older than Zoe. They love each other. Haha… Before Chloe came over I told Zoe that Chloe might be wearing a Snow White dress too. She said “No. I’M Snow White.”
   

                                                 



 
Ok about the photo above…. hahaha. I was hoping that as soon as Zoe saw Snow White she’d start smiling and getting excited. I watched her reaction and she was staring her down! She was looking her up and down like “What DA HELL are you doing wearing MY dress?” Gongju! Snow White had some Eastern European accent.

I thought Belle was the prettiest by far.



          
                                                 

          

Superfoods” are packed full of nutrients that have wide-ranging health benefits. Some critics think it’s misguided to focus on only a handful of healthy foods, but nobody argues that these foods pack a powerful nutritional punch.
Bottom line? Even if you can only wrangle one of these onto your kid’s plate, you’re doing good — and you may initiate a food habit that will help your child’s health throughout her life.

1. Avocado

The only vegetable laced with monounsaturated “good” fats that may lower “bad” LDL cholesterol that can harm the heart, avocado is also a super source of soluble fiber, which helps stabilize blood sugar. And it’s full of vitamin E, which protects your cells from free radicals.

“Try mashing avocado with a little lime or lemon juice and yogurt and using it on quesadillas or tacos — or as a dip for raw vegetables,” suggests Jessica Seinfeld.

2. Blueberries

Loaded with vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants — substances that slow the body’s release of chemicals that can damage cells — blueberries can help lower cholesterol, sharpen memory, and fight certain cancers. These little fruits offer big health benefits, whether fresh or frozen.

“I make a purple puree filled with blueberries and spinach that I add to tacos, burgers, pancakes, cookies, and brownies,” says Missy Chase Lapine. “Wild, organic, frozen blueberries are one of the most versatile nutrient-rich foods you can disguise in dishes.”

3. Oats

These mild-tasting, versatile whole grains help prevent blood sugar spikes and crashes, will keep your child feeling full, and aid in escorting bad cholesterol out of the body.

“Serve oatmeal for breakfast,” says Chase Lapine. “The old-fashioned rolled oats, not the quick-cooking kind — they offer more fiber and longer-lasting energy. Cook them in milk, rather than water, and top with blueberries for a well-balanced start to the day.”

4. Salmon

This cold-water fish contains healthful fats known as omega-3s that can lower the risk of heart disease. These nutrients may also help improve mood and prevent memory loss.

“Make your own fish fingers,” recommends Jennifer Iserloh. “Choose wild salmon to reduce your child’s exposure to toxic substances such as PCBs and mercury. Adults enjoy these lightly crumbed strips too.”

5. Spinach

An excellent source of iron, calcium, and folic acid, along with vitamins A and C, spinach is great for growing bones and brains.

“This versatile vegetable has a mild flavor and cooks in a flash,” notes Iserloh. “Stir it into hot soups, toss it into your tomato sauce, and tuck it into quesadillas.”

6. Sweet Potatoes

Packed with vitamins B, C, and E, plus calcium, potassium, and iron, sweet potatoes are also rich in complex carbohydrates and fiber, which keeps digestion moving along properly.

“Sweet potatoes are good at preventing a sugar crash, thanks to those complex carbs,” says Chase Lapine. “They also add a subtle sweetness to sneaky recipes and work hard to cut the acidity of tomato that some kids dislike in pasta sauces.”

7. Yogurt

Rich in calcium and a good source of protein, yogurt helps build strong bones and teeth. It also aids in digestion and fights bad bacteria in the gut.

“Buy plain low-fat yogurt and add your own fresh or frozen fruit to it,” recommends Iserloh. “That way, you’ll avoid the sugar that’s in flavored yogurts. It’s so creamy and comforting that most kids go for it.”

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
So on monday my outer upper lip was stinging a little. By evening it was puffy. By Tuesday morning it was a full out cold sore aka bad ass herpes sonofabitch. I’ve never had one before so this was my first time and I had no idea how to treat it or anything. I just know that cold sores are contagious so I was really cautious around Zoe. After work when I went to pick her up at school she was playing in the play yard outside with all the other tots. She sees me and comes running to hug me and sees my mouth, points at it and goes in a little concerned voice….

Zoe: Mommy what is that?
Me: It’s an ouchie.

Zoe: What happen?

Me: Um…a bug bit me. (this was the easiest explanation that I thought she could understand)

Zoe: Oh. A bug bite you?
Me: Yeah.
Zoe: Ohhh. Are you ok?

Me: Yeah.

Zoe: Do you need a bandaid?
Me: No. I’m ok. (thinking how cute she is…)

Then the cute factor evaporated as she proceeded to turn around and yell to all her friends “Ehbreebody! My mommy has a ouchie! Look!!!” and then proceeds to point her dirty grubby finger at my face. Next thing you know I have like 10 kids all under the age of 3 in my face like I’m some sort of science experiement and they’re all like “Ouchie?” or “Aya ya ya?!” and pointing THEIR grubby little fingers all up in my face! And Zoe is giving all the kids a little run down…

Zoe: A bug bite her. Ehbreebody no touching. It’s ouchie. My mommy says ‘No bug! No bug! (holding her hand up doing the hand motion for stop) Go away!
Then after her big production it’s like she remembers that I told her it hurt so she turns to face me again and says “Do you need a bandaid mommy? You want me to kiss it?”

NOT NOW AFTER YOU TOLD EVERYBODY AND THEIR MOTHER! Plus I didn’t want her to get it.
 

And that is how I became her ‘show-and-tell’ item to bring into school for 5 minutes. Some kid even sneezed on my face while examining my sore. Thanks. Thanks a lot. It’s been real. Let’s not ever do this again.

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Yesterday we were going up the stairs together and I was holding her right hand. After the 2nd step she turns to me and goes…

Zoe: Picka me up mommy.
Me: No. You’re a big girl. You can walk.
Zoe: No picka me up mommy!
Me: Why?
Zoe: Because you looooooove Zoe.

Pain in my ass!!!! I’m a sucka for sweetness. What can I say? I picked her up. How can you say no to that?

I had forgotten to post these! For Zoe’s birthday, back in march, Lila’s mommy Angi had baked some cookie favors for our guests while sticking with the Incredibles theme. Zoe LOVED these and talked about them for a month. And not like “Hey, those cookies were really good.” More like “Can I have an Incredible cookie?” “Zoe, we finished those a month ago.” “Mommy can I have an Incredible cookie?” “Are you not hearing what I’m saying?” And then she’d start crying while slurring her speech “iwanincrehiblecookie *sob* i wanincrehiblecookie.” Dear Lord. My husband, who is rarely impressed by any of my DIY projects, was HIGHLY impressed by Angi’s cookie decorating skills. Like HIGHLY. Like as in “OKAY I GET IT! SHUT UP! nevercomplimentedmeaboutanyofmyshit.” Hahaha No but seriously, in the cookie baking and decorating department, she is The Shiznit. Oh yeah, that’s right, I still use that word even though it’s like so 90′s. I’m old school….or just old.

If you want to place orders you can go to her site here: Meli + Angi





Thank you Angi!!!!!!!!!

Zoe’s Daily Funny:
Yesterday Zoe and I were playing house in the family room. She put on her cupcake apron and brought over the red polka dot apron for me to wear. While I was putting it over my head she said to me in a warning tone…

:: 06.17.10 :: Operation Toothbrush
                                         

:: 06.13.10 :: The Incredibles Tent
She loves doing this with her tent. I have no idea why. My only explanation is that she’s weird.